Baguettes–The French Bread Bat

Here is the problem you must surely always be having all the time. You are somewhere, yes? But you say, “Where am I? Am I in France or am I in the Congo?” How do you know which place?
Ho ho. Saint Just will tell you how to know. Look all over — look up and [...]

René Lacoste — Monsieur “Crocodile”

Night and Day. Sun and Moon. Snakes and Ladders. So likewise, Coco and Le Croc. They are the two halves of the French couture. Like the half pieces of a split chicken breast. Or like two halves of a face. Coco, she is the top half of the face with all the hair and the [...]

Eau de Miel

Do you have the dent douce? Perhaps you merely have the thirst from so long on Le Grand Tour, eh? Saint-Just has the solution élégante. We will murder two birds with but a single rock. A rock that is wet! I speak of the waters of Provence, but I speak in Occitan, the ancien language [...]

Saint-Just Hops to le Cinéma

The couture of France she would be nothing at all — nothing! –  without all the good dresses you see from Coco! Mme Coco she is the first to make a dress go just so, and also the quaint hat!
All France is so full of thanks and love for Mme Coco, so we make a [...]

Saint-Just et Voltaire vont au Château Blanc

Once again I would like so much to thank M. Rousseau for all the insight he has for Americaine politicks. Enough deep thinking, eh? Now we are back to good fun.
May I introduce my dear friend François-Marie Arouet. But he become so very angry when you call him with his girl names, so he likes [...]

RALchats

We citoyens of France love nothing more than to laugh audibly. Perhaps that is why we do love so the new fad of RALchats. I will teach you how to make RALchat.

It is so: You must have the funny photo of a cat or dog or even a walrus. On the photo you write the [...]

Je voudrais cinq tranches de jambon.

And now, because you look so weak, so pale, we must pause to have a small déjeuner. I personally wish to eat five sections of ham, but as I gaze about, I see nothing of ham. Not even une petite saucisse or a pig bone. Nothing.
But please be of cheer! In France we have many [...]

Le Beret: Very Like a Hat

We French like three things: the Song of the Angry Peasant, the hum of the Peugeot Electric Motor Scooter, and the snort of the girl who has had perhaps a bit too much wine. We also like three other things: the thump of the lobster as it hits the cobblestones when it escapes, the squeezy [...]

Swim With the Grapes

In my country we argue so much politics, art, philosophy. Yes. Our voices become so high and sometimes we send each other to the guillotine, yes. But one thing there is to which we give accord: wine in the tub.
How we love to eat our cheese and drink our wine while we bob gently in [...]

Wine: The Fluid of France

When you think of France in your mind what do you see? But, you see wine, of course! We have hundreds of grapes and many, many kinds of bottles. Let us count and sip as we go.

Also, we have tiny bites of cheese, the glory of our peasants..
Now, many people in the world, they [...]